Aging

I am glad I look my age. I do not want to look older, but I do like looking my age. I do not want people thinking I am a teenager. I like the respect I get as an adult. I don't wear high school shirts or purposefully do things to make me look younger. I like having a mature look to me. I do not want to wear clothes teenagers would wear or dress like my daughter. Being an adult has some great advantages. Act your age. Dress your age. Mature with grace.

Passive Agressive

I am so over passive aggressive people. If you have something to say, just say it. Do not use family members to get what you want from me. Do not text me at 10pm about something that is months away. If we have already talked about and agreed on a plan, do not bring it up like this is the first time we ave talked. If I make plans I will follow through. Do not act like you are the only one making decisions and I am to follow. I am just so tired of it. Act like the grown up you are and have an actual conversation with me. If you have concerns, let me know and we will work it out together. You are not in charge of my life and I have the right to make decisions that do not involve you. Grow up.

Facial Hair

Well, I am reaching that age where I am getting facial hair.  This is not a fun time as I am a woman.  It has happened gradually, and more often now.  I do find my self obsessed with other women's facial hair now.  I find myself searching, looking, staring at other women's upper lips and the sides of their cheeks.  I find that it is very normal to have some, and I think I am being overly sensitive about mine.  The first day I noticed it, I was in the parking lot of the local DMV.  I almost went to get some hair remover before walking in to get my licence removed.  I realized I did not have time, so I went in.  I felt like everyone was staring at this mustache on my face.  I am quite sure that they were not, but in that moment I felt very self conscious.  I was certain that my photo would show this monstrosity, but thankfully it did not.  As soon as I left, I went to the nearest Walgreens to get some hair remover.  I was so thankful to see that the cashier was not a flawless young teenager, but an older woman who, hopefully, could relate to my problem and not say a word.  I went in and the first stuff I saw was super expensive, so I went on a quest to find something cheaper.  I have incredibly sensitive skin and was nervous about buying the cheaper stuff.  I did, because I am cheap.  The cashier did not say anything about my purchase and away I went.  I came home and immediately tried it out.  Thankfully it worked great with only minor irritation.  I have since noticed that the side of my cheeks are getting worse, so it may be time to take care of those as well.  

I know this seems petty, but it is hell for women to grow old gracefully.  Men seem to age wonderfully and most get better looking with age.  And some women are that way too.  Sure Christie Brinkley has had a nip and tuck here or there, but she is gorgeous and an exception to the rule.  For those of us who do not have the money to have a plastic surgeon on call or a personal trainer available 24/7 it is harder for us to keep up. We get hair in places it should not be.  Things droop, and the bags under our eyes seem to get darker and baggier.  I have met women who look amazing and are older than me, but I do not have those genes.  I have the droopy, baggier, and plumpier genes.  I have worked out, quit eating all fast food, stopped eating carbs, and nothing happens.  My husband stops drinking soda and he loses 10lbs in a day.  Okay so not a day, but a week, and that isn't really fair either.  

I love being a woman, but is certainly is more work to keep looking decent.  I guess I will invest in more Spackle and slimmers and see where things land.  Literally.  

Motherhood

      Being a mother is the best thing in the world.  It is also the hardest.  I cannot think of another job that will make you cry and laugh all at the same time.  

     It is a full time 24/7 job.  I thought it would be so easy after I had my oldest.  It gets harder with each kid you add.  The sibling rivalry kicks in the moment they find out you are pregnant.  It also adds more love and laughter and wisdom.

     I thought I knew it all by the time I got pregnant with the youngest and the only girl.  Boy was I wrong.  I can not believe how little I know about raising girls even though I am a girl!  She is 5 but has so much attitude in that little body.  I am not her friend at least twice a week because I make her clean her room, do her chores, or if I do not let her do something she wants to.  Being a mother does not mean I am going to be best friend all of the time.  I love my children dearly and love to have fun and hang out, but I will also discipline when necessary.

     Now that they are older I find my self busy all over again.  There seemed to be a time when only the oldest was interested in sports and extra stuff after school.  Now that all three are school age, it seems like I barely have enough time to shower.  Between all of them being in some form of scouting, work, school, and church I can't believe I have time to sleep!  

    There are times that I think they can't grow up faster.  My sisters and I tortured each other, and now that we are grown we are great friends.   Other times they grow up way to fast.  I used to bring Grace into my bed when I went up.  With Dean working nights it was easy for me to do.  Last night she woke up a little after I made noise getting my shower.  I asked if she wanted to go to my bed, and she didn't.  This morning I asked her where she liked sleeping, in my bed or hers.  She said she liked sleeping in her bed the best.  I didn't think this day would come until she was like 10, but she is five and doesn't want to snuggle with mommy any more.  

         Being a mother is also incredibly rewarding.  The first time they walk, say mama to the first time they walk on the bus and learn to read.  When they ask you do something and then tell you that only you can do it right.  The sleepy smiles the first thing in the morning as they wake up and watching them sleep.  Seeing Zach grow up from a boy to a young man has been amazing.  

     Even when the days are long I am so blessed to be a mother.  Its the best thing in the world.

Busy, but Blessed

I am a mostly stay at home mom.  I have three wonderful children 2 boys 8 and 12 and a girl 5.  I homeschool the oldest and we are really enjoying our second year. I work 2 mornings a week at my church's preschool.  I absolutely love it.  I love the kids and the lovely ladies I work with.  I am so busy leading American Heritage Girls, running two boys to scouts, and leading large group at church.  I also help do the curriculum for Sunday mornings at church.  I am incredibly happily married to a most wonderful man.....who works nights.  Which is not a bad thing, except when my schedule gets so packed that I am home only 2 hours out of 12.  He was recently off with a back injury and was a huge help being a second house taxi, making dinners, lunches, breakfasts, and put stressful day for me.ting the kids to bed after a stressful day.

Since he was off I had time to do extra things.  I was talking to a friend and said, Dean is going back to work, it will be like I am a single mom.  Just meaning that I will be doing most of the stuff with kids and school.  I have since changed my thought on that.

I have had the pleasure to meet a wonderful woman at Grace's bus stop.  She has three young children and is a single mom.  Her kids are younger than mine and are fantastically cute.  I realized that just because Dean works at night, it does not mean I am like a single mom.  I realized walking home from the bus stop that even though I am super busy and doing most of the stuff with the kids I am not like a single mom.  I still have the love and support of Dean, even at night. and he is a huge help on the weekends.

It is different.  If I am sad or upset, even at work I can call him and he can help talk me through my stress.  He does little things to make me happy or smile before he goes to bed.  He backs me up when I have to discipline the kids.  When I am sick or hurt he is there to take care of me.  I guess I used that term more loosely than I should have.  Never again will I say, Its like I am a single mom.  I am not. Single moms work much harder being both mom and dad. I am truly amazed at how this lady does it all. I have the utmost respect for women who are single moms taking care of their children.   I am a blessed, busy, not really "stay at home" stay at home mom of three busy kids.